My neuroses are no secret. I'm passive-aggressive, quick to over analyze, rarely ever practice what I preach and I'm mopey, among other things. So as I write this, I'm just laying here and have a collection of anime music playing, because it's all I ever download for whatever reason. Sometimes I wonder, would I have ever been able to guess that I'd hit 24 years old and be the person I am right now?
(I would not have)
To be perfectly honest, I feel like the way my life is at the moment is a sentence for some crime I'd committed and may not remember. I wouldn't call myself anti social, but honestly, what other term might there be for me? I genuinely, generally get no satisfaction out of leaving the house unless for the necessary reasons (work, laundry, food shopping, occasionally going to buy a video game or two) and only those reasons. Otherwise I'm indoors, online, door shut. Put shortly, I don't like to be bothered. Seriously, I don't. I barely use my phone for other than texting and even then it's only a select few people, whom I want to hear from on an irregular basis. But wait!
Where's the classic awkward counter to this, Mike, you ask?
Simple. I'm a voracious flirt. I live off it. If the amount I flirted could be condensed into a liquid, I would be able to bathe in it. Not that the girls I flirt with would give me the time of day, though. Because what girl would put up with a mopey, passive-aggressive, self-deprecating kind of guy like myself?
(Not any I know)
That said, things just circle back to my own mopey feeling, day to day. Really I'm surprised I'm not in therapy or on medication to cope with this because it has got to be some sort of disorder, I know it. If it isn't, here's me invoking Quantum Disorder Mechanics, and having just brought the disorder to reality by speaking it aloud. Brace for medication ads for this problem.
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